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Thread: Carteeg's Age of Mortals Campaign

  1. #21
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    The funniest thing is that even though that log took me the longest time to put up, it had to had been one of our shortest sessions. Go fig. : )
    "A payment. My life will simply be a payment. But only when all are free... My fault."
    - The Prophet, as recorded from testimony in FyxZharar, 431 AD

    All must prepare. The Prophet has entered the war.

    Projects (Dragonlance, and Non-DL):
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    "Chef Nightly" (iOS/Android)
    The Adlatum Project - Sourcebook Available
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  2. #22
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    Key of Destiny: Day 28 and 29

    Screw the intro and opening joke. ACTION!

    Luziann steps forward as the undead kender slowly climb out of the bloody pool, and from seemingly nowhere a spell causes her to instantly fall asleep.
    Peādārr: "Figures."
    Dragging her back into the hallway, he glances up into the room just in time to see a cone of cold blast heading his way. He ducks away for partial damage. Luziann, who was partially shielded, saves... Plus with her evasion, her sleeping body takes no damage.
    Peādārr growls and kicks her hard for several points of damage.
    Luziann: "Ow!"
    As the kender zombies approach the doorway, Peādārr and Luziann can now see the Fallen Ogre Mage (previously invisible) holding onto a bone staff. Peādārr turns a bulk of the kender, destroying many of them.
    Luziann fires a crossbow bolt at the spellcasting hulk.
    *ploink!*
    It bounces off.
    Luziann: "Son of a..."
    The kender attack... pathetically.
    Undead kender #1: "Brains...."
    Undead kender #2: "Brains...."
    Undead kender #3: "You have no...."
    Undead kender #4: "Brains."
    Luziann blinks and glances at Peādārr: "Was that a taunt attempt?"
    Undead kender #3: "You must had dropped your..."
    Undead kender #1: "Brains...."
    Peādārr: "Guess so."
    Their attacks are pathetic and only do a few points of damage every round or so. Luz and Peādārr elect to focus their attacks on the ogre.
    Unfortunately Luz can't get a strong enough hit to hurt it, and just before Peādārr can cast his lightning spell, the ogre recasts invisibility and vanishes.
    Instead Peādārr takes out a vial of holy water and tries to throw it at one of the kender. However, in the wind up, his hand strikes Luziann in the face.
    Luziann: "OW!"
    The water splashes off of her and mildly irritates a couple of the kender.
    Peādārr: "Sorry."
    Suddenly they are submerged into darkness.
    Luziann: "Yeah. We're doing GREAT! OW!"
    Undead kender #1: "I'm bored and your insides are interesting. Can I play with them?"
    Luz switches to her sword. Then Peādārr feels the wind caused by a heavy object just barely missing his head.
    Peādārr fires blindly forward, nailing two of the kender and the ogre with lightning. The ogre grunts in pain. Hearing that, Luziann shoves one kender aside (losing a few items in the process) and swings at where she thinks the ogre is.
    She guesses well and slices hard into his body.
    Peādārr launches another lightning blast after the kender continue to whittle the hit points slowly away. Luziann is able to duck away before the ogre is crispied again. The ogre tracks where the lightning came from through the darkness and swings the staff. Peādārr blasts the ogre one last time just as he himself is hit. Peādārr collapses.

    Meanwhile....

    Arden: "Whiff!"
    Another pyre blast spews from the pit. *ROAR!*
    Kerra shouts from far away from the pit: "Missed me again, afflicking loser!"
    *ROAR!*
    Arden: "Whiff! Stop! It's me!"
    *ROAR!*
    Kerra: "Looks like somebody can't hit a target!"
    Arden slowly approaches the pit: "Whiff!"
    Another flare comes up and Arden is forced to back off a few times until he finally closes in on the edge.
    Arden: "Whiff?"
    Silence.
    Arden waits a moment: "Whiff? Are you out of spells?"
    Silence.
    Kerra: "Maybe she got bored."
    Arden looks down the pit and can barely see movement. "Whiff? Are you okay?"
    Silence.
    After a few moments, he carefully ties off a rope and edges himself down, careful of the sharp edges. "Whiff?"
    Halfway down, he sees her move clearly.
    Whiff: "Hello?!"
    Arden: "Hello! Whiff. The rope is by your feet."
    Whiff blinks: "Hello?!"
    Arden: "Whiff, I'm up here."
    Whiff looks up: "Oh! Hi, Arden!"
    Arden: "Grab the rope."
    Whiff: "Hi! What are you doing up there?"
    Arden: "Whiff. The rope."
    Whiff: "Oh. There's a rope here!" She begins to climb.
    Arden: "Just be careful of the sharp edges."
    Whiff: "HEY ARDEN!"
    Arden jumps, causing his foot to slip. The sharp edges of the pit cut his foot. He bites back the pain.
    Whiff: "The rocks look sharp! You should be careful."
    Arden sighs: "Great. She blasted herself to deafness."
    Climbing out they stand up (although Arden is still in pain).
    Kerra remains sitting by the hole leading to the ant tunnel: "Finally out I see," she said with a somewhat mischievous grin towards Whifflenut. "Too busy flicking things to find your own way up?"
    Whiff blinks at her: "What!? If you're going to say something, you shouldn't be whispering!"
    Kerra: "YOU WERE TOO BUSY FLICKING THINGS-!"
    Whiff: "WHAT!?"
    Kerra: "I SAID-"
    Arden's ears hurt. Arden: "Maybe we should get back to the others."
    A rumble from the hallway causes him to turn, but Whifflenut distracts him. "WHAT!?"
    Arden puts his hand to the side of his mouth and shouts at her: "I SAID, 'MAYBE WE SHOULD GET BACK TO THE OTHERS!'"
    Whiff: "YOU KNOW... PUTTING YOUR HAND TO YOUR MOUTH LIKE THAT DOESN'T WORK IF YOU KEEP WHISPERING!!!"
    Kerra: "That's it. I'm sticking with the bugs." She leaves.
    Arden: "I'M NOT! I'M-"
    Whifflenut: "YOU KNOW, WE SHOULD PROBABLY FIND THE OTHERS!" She goes bounding off into the hallway.
    Arden sighs and follows.

    Meanwhile....
    Luziann watches Peādārr drop. Luckily his last blast causes the ogre to stumble backwards into the center of the room. With a final cry, he falls backwards over the altar. Just as the kender zombies begin to bend over the prone, yet conscious, Peādārr, the magic animating them fails and they collapse.
    Luziann sighs with relief. "Okay, Peādārr. Let me get you out of here and heal you-"
    Voice: "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!?"
    Luziann turns around to see a red dragonspawn woman well over six-feet tall enter the chamber.
    The dragonspawn woman points a finger straight at Luziann: "You will pay for what you have ruined!"
    Luziann realizes that covered in blood, she is the only person other than this woman who is standing in the room. Peādārr is lying still under the kender bodies.
    Luziann: "Oh you've got to be kidding me."
    Flames begin to shoot from the edge of the dragonspawn's mouth: "I will burn the flesh from your bones, and You ... Will.... BUUUUURRRRRRNNNNNNN!!!!!"
    Luziann mutters a CoC violating curse and quickly takes out her crossbow. The dragonspawn breaths fire, but Luz dives out of the way. With a crossbow shot, the bolt strikes the woman's scaly flesh, but fails to penetrate.
    Luziann shouts MANY CoC violating curses as the woman charges straight at her with a barbed whip.

    Arden and Whifflenut round the corner to see Peādārr lying on the ground with several dead kender around him.
    Whifflenut screams at Peādārr, horrified beyond belief: "PEĀDĀRR!!! YOU KILLED KENDER!"
    Arden looks over Peādārr and sees Luziann diving sideways to avoid the dragonspawn's first breath attack. He takes his sword out and charges forward. "Pardon me, Pete." He jumps over the injured mystic and rushes into the room.
    Whifflenut runs up to Peādārr and shouts: "WELL, I'M SURE THEY WERE TRUE KENDER AND DESERVED IT!" She takes a vial from her supplies and makes him drink it.
    He gains a mild resistance to fire.
    Peādārr blinks.
    Whifflenut then takes out another vial, one labeled 'Cure Light Wounds'.
    Whifflenut: "Oh. I didn't know I had this. You want?"
    Peādārr glares: "Next round would be nice."
    Arden tries to strike at the woman and discovers she's a tough one to hurt. What's worse it that in the dragonspawn's rage, she focuses her attacks solely on Luziann, preventing her from any flanking maneuvers. Just as Peādārr is healed and gets up, Luziann is struck hard, almost falling over.
    Peādārr rushes up behind Luziann and heals her up to full.
    Arden misses.
    The dragonspawn strikes Luziann with a bite and two strong hits of the whip (one crit). Luziann goes from full health to unconsciousness in one group of attacks.
    Peādārr, standing behind Luz, keeps his hand on her back as she falls towards him. He casts another cure and pushes her forward towards the beast.
    Luz tries to swing, but is hit by the woman again. She falls back into Peādārr, who props her up with his hand, cures, and pushes her forward towards the dragonspawn.
    Arden pauses to watch the repeating cycle with mild bewilderment.
    Luziann: "Great. I'm a metronome. You know," she says to Peādārr, *struck* *falling* *propped* *healed* *pushed* *swing* "for once I'm really appreciating your skills." *struck* *falling* *propped* *healed* *pushed* *swing*
    Peādārr: "Unfortunately, I only have a few more major cures left."
    The dragonspawn grins: "And I get a death throe."
    Whifflenut realizes that she can't use any major spells since that would hit the group as well... plus she used most of them trying to kill Kerra. She begins whittling the woman down with magic missiles.
    After one shove, Luziann swings hard and hurts the dragonspawn, and Arden also manages to get a hit in. That combined with Whifflenuts steady flow of magic missiles, the demonic-looking woman slumps to the ground... ironically, exactly at zero hit points, exactly like Peādārr was earlier.
    She waits for death.
    It doesn't come.
    Dragonspawn (Sindra): "Go ahead.... END IT!"
    Whifflenut: "No chance. We want some answers."
    Arden pulls the weapons away from weakened woman and keeps an eye on her. Peādārr and Luziann step away for a moment to use up the rest of Peādārr's spells.
    Whifflenut: "First off, do you know anything about a stupid music box?"
    Sindra blinks: "What?"
    Whifflenut: "How about this?" She pulls out a dead kender arm.
    Arden: "...uh.... What is that?"
    Whifflenut looks up at Arden: "It's the shard of light thing I took from Peādārr."
    Peādārr, who wasn't watching, overhears: "What?" Looking to check his things, he sees a one-armed dead kender was trying to stuff the shard of light into a hole in its side for safe keeping before it collapsed. "Oh, here it is."
    Arden clears his throat: "Uh, Whiff."
    Whifflenut looks at the arm: "EEEWWW!!!" She drops it.
    Arden: "Wait. Weren't you deafened?"
    Whifflenut repeatedly wipes her hands on her robe: "Huh? Oh no. I thought it was just fun to annoy y- uhh.. the true kender."
    Arden: "I don't think it did."
    Whifflenut: "Sure it did. She was trying to taunt me, and it wasn't working because she thought I couldn't hear."
    Arden: "She didn't look annoyed. She just got bored."
    Whifflenut: "And nothing is more annoying to a true kender than being bored."
    Luziann and Peādārr walk back over.
    Luziann: "Guys! Evil character interrogation."
    Whifflenut: "Oh. Right." She grabs the shard of light sword from Peādārr. "So what is this?" she asks Sindra.
    Sindra looks at it, and tries to lunge forward and impale herself on the blade.
    Whiff backs up and prevents that from happening.
    Arden pins Sindra to the ground. "What are you doing? Are you trying to kill yourself?"
    Luziann: "I thought that was obvious."
    Arden: "Answer the questions."
    Sindra sighs: "I don't know anything about a music box or that."
    Whifflenut: "OH COME ON! We've been carrying that stupid thing since the start of this adventure, and this was the climax, right? There has to be some explanation for why we're here."
    Arden asks about the ritual. She explains it was part of a plot for the ogre to make himself a titan again and for her to find a way to continue the dragonspawn population.
    Whifflenut: "Doesn't that happen when a boy dragon and a girl dragon like each other."
    Sindra sneers: "No, that produces dragons."
    Whifflenut: "Yeah. The dragon's spawn."
    Sindra: "Dragonspawn is what I am."
    Whifflenut: "And you need a ritual to make more of you?"
    Sindra: "Malys created us through magic, but with her dead there is no way to make more unless another method is found. That is what this ritual was for."
    Whifflenut's eyes widen: "Oh! You wanted to make yourself a boyfriend!"
    Sindra shouts: "NO! The original process that created me and the others rendered us sterile."
    Whifflenut suddenly looks sympathetic: "You mean you can't have sex?"
    Sindra's desire for suicide now has nothing to do with taking them with her with a death throe. Ending her torment would be enough of a reason.
    Luziann: "She can, Whiff. She just can't have children."
    Whifflenut: "Have them do what?"
    Sindra: "Just kill me and get this over with."
    Whifflenut: "Nope. Sorry. You're staying with us."
    The Shard of Light begins to glow.
    Whifflenut blinks: "Oh. I guess it shines when it's close to you."
    Luziann clears her throat and points over Whifflenut's shoulder. The hall Sindra originally came from is also glowing.
    Whiffenut: "Oh."
    They head off, and with Sindra stripped of her weapons and armor (given only a sheet to cover herself). They reach a thick steel door.
    Luziann: "Hrm. Big steel door after a major fight. What are the chances that it's trapped."
    Sindra: "It's not trapped."
    Peādārr investigates the door with a 'Find Traps' spell from a wand. It's trapped.... massively trapped. Peādārr pales and tells them the door can trigger a gas vapor mechanism that will hurt anyone in a good section of the hallway.
    Luziann nods. "Everyone out. Let me deal with this."
    Arden: "Are you sure?"
    Luziann blinks: "I'm the rogue of the group."
    Arden: "Yeah, but you remember what happened when you tried to open that locked door in the temple."
    Luziann frowns at him.
    Arden: "You had..."
    Luziann frowns at him.
    Arden coughs: "Uh. Good luck."
    The group returns to the ritual room and waits.
    Luziann slows walks back into the room.
    Peādārr sighs: "You couldn't disarm the trap, could you."
    Luziann looks murderous: "I...." She grinds her teeth as she talks. "I couldn't find it...."
    Peādārr rolls his eyes and uses the wand to up her find traps skill.
    Luz heads back in, finds the trap, but has difficulty disarming it.
    Arden blinks and looks to Sindra: "Wait. You came from that hall. You must have a key or some way to bypass it, right?"
    Luziann overheard: "SON OF A-!"
    They search her and her things. No key.
    Whifflenut: "It must be hidden in an orifice. Arden, go look."
    Arden's eyes widen in fear: "Uh... My search score isn't that high!"
    Whifflenut: "Take 20."
    Arden winces and whimpers.

    50 minutes later.

    Luziann walks out: "I did it. It's disarmed, fina.... Arden, what are you doing?"
    Sindra: "Please kill me."
    Arden shudders.

    The group heads back to the steel door.
    Luziann: "All set. The trap is disarmed."
    Peādārr pulls on the door.
    It's locked.
    They all look at Luziann.
    Luziann: "I... I... Forgot the...." She swallows. "I'll get the lock picked."
    She fails the check.
    Whifflenut: "If you want something done right, get in the way of those who can do it properly."
    She fails the check, even with a kick-*** roll.
    Whifflenut: "Damn. Kender could play for hours with a lock like that."
    Peādārr tries and fails.
    Luziann: "Just... give me some time. I should be able to do it in a few minutes."

    14 hours 37 minutes and 53 seconds later....

    Luziann giggles insanely: "I DID IT! I DID IT!"
    Arden thwaps Sindra on the head a few times to make sure she didn't heal up over the night, and the group returns to the door.
    Opening the door, they find an armory.
    Suddenly the glow of the shard strikes the far wall. On it is a Dragonlance.
    The glow grows.
    Whifflenut: "MY EYES!!!"
    Luziann: "Great. First deaf. Now blind."
    The light begins to form into the spectral shape of a beautiful elven woman.
    Whifflenut clears her vision and then screams: "GHOST!" She charges in swinging.
    Ghost: "Finally, you have over...." She looks down to see Whifflenut inside of her, swinging through her misty form. "Please stop that."
    Whifflenut: "DIE CREATURE OF DEATH!"
    Ghost: "Please stop."
    The rest of the group is too tired to bother to try and stop her. Finally the ghost steps to the side. Whifflenut continues swinging, but doesn't notice that the ghost has moved.
    Ghost starts again: "Finally, you have overcome great hardships to release us from the darkness! Come, heroes... take up..." Her eyes focus on Sindra. "Why is she still alive?"
    Sindra: "...help me...."
    Luziann: "She's coming with us."
    The ghost blinks dumbfounded. "But she's the end mob for this part of the adventure. You're supposed to kill her."
    Luziann: "Why?"
    The Ghost pulls out her copy of 'Key of Destiny' and thumbs through the last pages: "Her death is supposed to throw evil into turmoil. Possibly to clear the way for peace in this area. To help the kender."
    Peādārr: "Nope. No need. She was defeated. We're good."
    The ghost sighs: "This is going to complicate things in the later parts of the campaign, isn't it."
    Whifflenut: "YOUR END IS NIGH!" *swings through the air*
    Sindra: "I try to tell them."
    Luziann: "This is just the type of adventure we've been on. Go with it."
    Whifflenut sighs: "Okay. Fine. But maybe you can answer us in regards to this stupid music b-"
    The ghost shakes her head: "Finally, you have overcome great hardships to release us from the darkness!"
    Arden: "You said that already."
    Ghost: "Come, heroes... take up the lance and embrace your destinies." And with that she vanishes. The lights die down to normal.

    Luziann looks at the lance. "That's it. It's a frickin' Dragonlance. The damn setting is named after these things. They're available at every 5'n'dime for a buck a dozen."
    Whifflenut: "Maybe it's a special one. I KNOW! Play the music box near it."
    Luziann pulls out the box and opens it.
    The music is horrible. Nothing happens.
    Luziann puts it away. "This is it? No explanation at all for this damn thing. The entire adventure was called 'Key of Destiny'! And we didn't even get the box it either! What did anything we do have to do with this piece of garbage AT ALL!?"
    Sindra: "Take it and leave."
    Luziann: "This is stupid!" She notices that the ghost left her copy of 'Key of Destiny' on the shelf and picks it up.
    Peādārr: "Maybe it has some useful tidbits in it towards the back."
    Luziann opens it.
    Whifflenut: "What does it say?"
    Luziann: "Elmore's Sovereign Stone. Campaign Sourcebook SVP-3011. Enter-"
    Whifflenut: "THAT'S AN AD! Flip earlier."
    Luziann flips and frowns: "Is this supposed to be a picture of you?" She shows Sindra the b&w image of her.
    Sindra shrugs: "It's a simplistic style."
    Luziann rubs her eyes. "I didn't get any sleep last night. I'll read it later."
    Arden looks around the room: "Well, at least we're getting some nice stuff at the end of this trip.... Hold a second, did the ghost woman say 'later in this campaign'?"
    The room goes dead silent.
    Luziann screams.
    Peādārr: "That's it. I'm going to find a bar."
    Sindra: "Or you could get yourselves injured, huddle around me, cut my throat, and let my blast result in a TPK."
    Arden: "Nice try."
    Sindra: "Look. Ghost lady was right. I'm the end mob. I'm not supposed to remain here. You didn't keep Pegrin alive in Sylvan Key! At most you might had wanted to keep Cole."
    Whifflenut: "Yeah, but you're more interesting. HEY! You could be my new familiar. I lost mine after we ate it."
    Luziann: "You ate it. We thought you were dead at the time..... Good times."
    Arden nods towards Peādārr: "Bar it is. Let's just collect what treasure and weapons we can and get out of here."
    Peādārr: "You know, for a climax to a long adventure, this wasn't very exciting."
    Luziann: "That's because Miss Red here was only attacking me."
    Peādārr nods: "That could be it."
    Arden shrugs: "Well, I'm sure the next part of the adventure will actually explain things. Besides, this last bit lasted a long time. I'm sure the book for part two isn't anywhere near as thick."
    The rest of the group hesitates before they slowly walk out the door in resignation.
    Whifflenut pouts: "I'm depressed."

    END OF 'KEY OF DESTINY'!

    TO BE CONTINUED IN.... (Luziann weeps) SPECTRE OF SORROWS!

    Sindra: "SERIOUSLY! I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO SURVIVE INTO THE NEXT ADVENTURE! DON'T FORCE ME TO SUFFER WITH YOU! I DON'T DESERVE THIS!"
    Last edited by Carteeg_Struve; 04-01-2009 at 01:43 PM.
    "A payment. My life will simply be a payment. But only when all are free... My fault."
    - The Prophet, as recorded from testimony in FyxZharar, 431 AD

    All must prepare. The Prophet has entered the war.

    Projects (Dragonlance, and Non-DL):
    "The Dying Towers of Ryst: An Achanian Tale"
    "Chef Nightly" (iOS/Android)
    The Adlatum Project - Sourcebook Available
    Art of Psycha Durmont

  3. #23
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    Any updates on this? I've been LMAO at the rest of the posts, waiting impatiently for the next one.
    “There's always, always a choice. My options might really, truly suck, but that doesn't mean there isn't a choice.”

    - Harry Dresden -

  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kendermage View Post
    Any updates on this? I've been LMAO at the rest of the posts, waiting impatiently for the next one.
    Late reply... but............ it's coming.... I've begun reviewing the SoS material.
    "A payment. My life will simply be a payment. But only when all are free... My fault."
    - The Prophet, as recorded from testimony in FyxZharar, 431 AD

    All must prepare. The Prophet has entered the war.

    Projects (Dragonlance, and Non-DL):
    "The Dying Towers of Ryst: An Achanian Tale"
    "Chef Nightly" (iOS/Android)
    The Adlatum Project - Sourcebook Available
    Art of Psycha Durmont

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carteeg_Struve View Post
    Late reply... but............ it's coming.... I've begun reviewing the SoS material.
    Shouldn't Luz be going "No!!!!!!!!" at this point?
    I'm personally going for "Hooray!".
    Kith Koby, Speaker of the Sun and Stars.

    "And thy renown went forth among the nations for thy beauty;
    for it was perfect through my comeliness, which I had put upon thee, saith the Lord God." -Ezekiel, XVI, 14.

    "From the Devil they come and to the Devil they will go." - Bernard of Clairvaux.

    "Auta i lome!" - "Day shall come again!"

  6. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kith Koby View Post
    Shouldn't Luz be going "No!!!!!!!!" at this point?
    I'm personally going for "Hooray!".
    She doesn't know yet. Don't tell.
    "A payment. My life will simply be a payment. But only when all are free... My fault."
    - The Prophet, as recorded from testimony in FyxZharar, 431 AD

    All must prepare. The Prophet has entered the war.

    Projects (Dragonlance, and Non-DL):
    "The Dying Towers of Ryst: An Achanian Tale"
    "Chef Nightly" (iOS/Android)
    The Adlatum Project - Sourcebook Available
    Art of Psycha Durmont

  7. #27
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    Previously... on Dragonlance: Age of Mortals

    Peādārr: "If we don't carry this ring to Mordor and destroy it, we're all doomed!"
    Luziann: "We must be ready, everyone. Winter is coming."
    Elijayess: "I am... the Kwisatz Haderach."
    Arden: "The Dragon's been captured! The damn witches are taking him to Tar Valon!"
    Sindra: "Hand over those slippers, my pretty!"
    Kerra: "If you go... to Z'ha'dum... you will die."
    Whifflenut: "I love you, Edwahhh! Ew... sorry. Is that what you look like with your shirt off? Ugh. Oh god. I'm going to throw up."
    Peādārr: "The halflings have been captured."
    Luziann: "I made an oath to put on the black. Nothing can change that."
    Elijayess: "Call the worms."
    Arden: "I know who killed Asmodean...and the murderer is in this room!"
    Sindra: "When this hourglass runs out... you will die! MWAHAHAHA!"
    Kerra: "Only one human has ever survived battle with a kender fleet. He is behind me. You are in front of me. If you value your lives... be somewhere else!"
    Whifflenut: "If I cannot be with you, then I don't want to li-Uh.... sorry. That chest shot made me puke. Good god, Edward! I've seen Unicef posters of guys with better looking bodies than that. Where's a bathroom?"
    The nuke goes off. *BOOOOM!*
    Captain Trunk: "HAMMER!!!"
    Mysterious figure to Peādārr: "Hello.... son."
    Peādārr (breathlessly): ".... no..."

    Fade to Black

    And now the conclusion... part 1.

    Specter of Sorrows: Day 30 (10 months later)

    07:59:56 (boop)
    07:59:57 (beep)
    07:59:58 (boop)
    07:59:59 (beep)
    08:00:00 (boop)
    (beep)

    Luziann and Sindra are relaxing at a resort spa, drinking cocktails in the sun. Arden's out swimming in the ocean. Whifflenut is running a curio shop on the walkway, and Peādārr is with his young bride at the hospital... helping her give birth.

    Luz: "You know... ten months at this place actually made up for the s***ty month that took place before it."
    Sindra: "I can't believe I actually wanted you people to kill me off. This place is gr-"

    The journey through the ant tunnels progresses with surprising ease, although the footing is treacherous at times. As they emerge from the twisting passageway, they are greeted by the sullen light of the Desolation's dawn. Behind them, the volcanic peak casts its shadow to the west, while the ruins of Kendermore can be seen off to the south.

    Peādārr: "PUSH!" *blink* He looks around and sees the environment and the others, including the kender they rescued. "Oh no.... Oh NO! NO! NO!"
    Luz: "Well, it was nice while it lasted."
    Arden: "Hey, Pete."
    Sindra: "How did we get back here?"
    Luz: "Don't ask those questions."
    Whifflenut blinks at Peādārr: "What were you doing?"
    Peādārr sneers: "Nevermind."
    Arden: "Crouching like that I'd say he was helping somebody shove boxes."
    Luz sighs: "As much as I could complain, ten months was a hell of a lot longer of a break than I expected. We should get ready to go."
    Whifflenut: "What's the need to get ready for? Don't you want to travel around in that bikini?"
    Luz: "I think it might be distracting for Arden."
    Arden *cough*
    Whifflenut: "Actually I think he was looking at Sindra."
    Sindra smirks.
    Arden *blink* "WHAT? NO!"
    Sindra frowns, pissed.
    Peādārr shakes his head as the others get their armor and stuff on. "Forget it. I'm not budging."
    Sindra: "Isn't anybody going to give me my armor or weapons back?"
    Luz: "Nope. You were a prisoner at this point. You get nothing."
    Sindra: "Oh come on!"
    Arden: "Pete? You coming?"
    Peādārr sits down on the ground: "No. I'm staying here. The adventure was stupid and pointless before. I'm not getting involved. I'm staying put!"
    The volcano explodes.
    Peādārr thinks it over.
    Arden: "Uh, we should get going."
    Peādārr: "I'm thinking...."
    Whifflenut: "But you have to come. I kept trying to sell off that stupid music box at my store, and nobody would take it."
    Arden freezes: "You tried selling it?"
    Whifflenut nods: "Of course. Would you want to keep the thing? I wanted it gone."
    Arden: "Funny. It's really nice. No one would buy it?"
    Whifflenut: "Nope. But some kender did try to walk off with it."
    Luz frowns at her: "Try?"
    Whifflenut: "They didn't pay for it! I wasn't going to let them steal it."
    Luz slaps her forehead.
    Arden: "What does that have to do with Peādārr?"
    Whifflenut: "I slipped the jewlery box-"
    Peādārr: "Music box."
    Whifflenut: "... music box into his things. He has it."
    Peādārr stands up and takes the music box out: "Oh no.... HERE! TAKE IT!"
    Whifflenut walks away: "Nope!"
    Peādārr following: "TAKE IT!"
    Whifflenut continues on: "No."
    Sindra looks to everyone: "Some armor? How about a dagger?"
    Luz ties Sindra's hands off and starts leading her away with the kender.

    Kerra whispers to another kender: "Shouldn't we be heading towards Kendermore, that way?"
    The other kender shrugs. "They're the adventurers. We follow."

    The first session of SoS will continue shortly... after these messages.


    A guy stares at himself in the bathroom mirror, contemplating.
    Voice-over: "Are you too embarrassed to talk to your doctor about E.D.? Well you should be, you loser."
    Guy: "HEY!"
    Last edited by Carteeg_Struve; 02-05-2010 at 02:54 PM.
    "A payment. My life will simply be a payment. But only when all are free... My fault."
    - The Prophet, as recorded from testimony in FyxZharar, 431 AD

    All must prepare. The Prophet has entered the war.

    Projects (Dragonlance, and Non-DL):
    "The Dying Towers of Ryst: An Achanian Tale"
    "Chef Nightly" (iOS/Android)
    The Adlatum Project - Sourcebook Available
    Art of Psycha Durmont

  8. #28
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    Voice-over: "lasting over four hours.... get a date, dude. Seriously."

    And now back to our program

    The heroes, Sindra, Luz, Arden, Peādārr, and Whifflenut spend the day dodging flaming rocks projected from the volcano. Ashen clouds flow through the air.

    Peādārr: "Please. *cough* *cough*"
    Whifflenut: "Nope. It's yours forever."
    Arden: "You know, you can cover your mouth with a handkerchief of something."
    Sindra starts hacking.
    Whifflenut: "Shouldn't she be immune to this stuff? Being like a demon thing."
    Luziann: "She's a dragonspawn. Not a demon."
    Whifflenut: "Oh. Well, shouldn't she still be immune."
    Sindra: *cough* "I wish."

    At this point a woman with her face covered in a veil begins to approach.

    Peādārr: "We've got an encounter coming."
    Luziann: "Finally we can get to something important."
    Peādārr: "Yeah. It's not like I wasn't doing anything important before I was sucked back over here."
    Whifflenut: "What were you doing?"
    Peādārr: "It's none of your business."
    Arden: "You were telling someone to push something."
    Peādārr: "You mean my wife?"
    Whifflenut: "Oh! So she was giving birth."
    Sindra: "Or he was telling somebody to shove her off of a cliff."
    Everybody stares at her.
    Sindra: "I was just trying to keep the possibilities open."
    Veiled woman: "Um. Hello. I need help."
    Whifflenut: "Not right now. Adults are talking."
    Peādārr: "I was not shoving her off of a cliff."
    Sindra: "You should consider it. It's fun."
    Whifflenut: "Really?" She shoves Kerra into a nearby ditch.
    Kerra: "Ow."
    Whifflenut: "You're right! That's fun!"
    Veiled woman: "Uh. Everyone. I...." She sees Sindra. "Wait. Shouldn't she be dead by now?"
    Whifflenut: "One second. I have to go to the bathroom." (pees into the ditch)
    Kerra: "AAAHHH!!!!"
    Sindra (to veiled woman): "If I were dead, I'd be missing out on this."
    Arden: "WHIFF! I know we're not 'exactly' all good aligned, but can we at least have some standards?"
    Kerra: "Could somebody get me out of here?"
    A kender: "Not with you smelling like that I'm not."
    Veiled woman: "EVERYONE!.... My brother needs help. He was hurt and is waiting in a cave."
    Whifflenut: "Peādārr's a healer."
    Peādārr: "I'm not a healer! I'm a mystic!"
    Arden: "Uh, you're not a cleric. You're still a healer."
    Peādārr: "Oh.. I... Dammit. I'm too used to correcting people. Alright. I can help."
    Veiled woman steps back from Peādārr: "No need. Uh... my brother and I don't trust magic. This man here should be able to help." (referring to Arden)
    Whifflenut: "Wait... you want healing, but not a healer."
    Veiled woman: "We want a healer, just normal healing. Herbs and bandages."
    Whifflenut: "... They still have those?"
    Veiled woman to Peādārr: "No offense."
    Whifflenut: "To heck with it." She heads off in the direction the woman came from.
    Kerra: "My hands are slipping off of the rocks. Maybe a rope?"
    Sindra: "If I don't get any weapons, you don't get a rope."
    Luz: "Why would you want Arden? He's not a healer."
    Male voice in the distance: "AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

    Everyone runs off towards the cave.

    Kerra: "Hello? ..... Anyone? ........................................... Okay, I'm getting pissed."

    Meanwhile at the cave.

    The group heads into the cave and sees Whifflenut finishing amputating one of the man's legs off. "Hi everyone. Don't worry. I've removed the bad leg. So he should be fine."

    Everyone stares in horror.

    Whifflenut: "Oh. Whoops. Wrong leg." *CHOP!* "Got it!"
    Sindra: "I love this group."
    Peādārr quickly runs to the drooling man's side and casts cures on him to prevent the man from bleeding out.
    Luziann: "Is he alright?"
    The man continues to drool.
    Peādārr: "Good enough for now."
    Veiled woman to Arden: "Can I speak to you outside?"
    Arden: "Uh... yeah."
    Those two leave.
    Whifflenut ray of frosts the severed legs. "There. Nice and cold. Okay, Peādārr. I'll hold them up against the stumps, and you can cast a cure or something to get them to reattach."
    Peādārr: "Uh, it doesn't work that way."
    Man: *drool*
    Sindra: "I really love this group."
    Peādārr: "We should rest for the night."
    Sindra: "I'll take watch."
    Luziann: "You're a prisoner. You can't take watch."
    Sindra: "Sure I can."
    Peādārr: "Let Arden take watch."
    Whifflenut: "Sure. He's outside. Probably getting hit on by what's her face."
    Luziann sighs.

    Whifflenut heads out and sees the woman caressing Arden's cheek as he smiles back. Whifflenut sighs and shoots them both with magical darts. The woman yells out with an inhuman hiss. "Figures," says Whiff. She releases additional spells. The woman drops the illusion, and the lamia casts a spell to create an illusory duplicate of herself. Arden, under the charm spell, attacks Whifflenut.

    Peādārr hears the commotion and heads out, seeing the fight. Whifflenut knocks Arden out with a sleep spell. Whiff gets severely hurt as Peādārr tries to call lightning. Whifflenut knocks the lamia unconscious right before Peādārr's spell fries the creature. Arden is woken and snapped out of it.

    Arden: "Sorry about that."
    Whifflenut: "Ow. Tough fight."
    Kerra (still in the hole): "You know, I could have helped if I had been let out of this trench."
    Peādārr: "We better get some rest."
    Arden: "Where's Luz?"

    They head back to the cave to find Sindra standing over a hog-tied Luziann on the ground. Sindra sees them entering and pauses.

    Sindra: "Uhh..... she was trying to escape."
    Another kender: "This group is so exciting!"

    Luziann is released.
    Arden (experiencing a wisdom drain) looks at the drooling guy: "Should we tie him up? I mean, if her sister was a lamia... does that mean he's a lamio?"
    Luziann: "Just sleep, Arden... I have another party member I want to kill."
    Arden: "Sindra's a member of the party?"

    The next morning, the group gets ready to head out.

    Arden: "Okay. My head's feeling a little better."
    Peādārr: "Are we ready to go finally?"
    Luziann: "Do we have everything?"
    Whifflenut: "Yep. I've got the copy of the adventure."
    Luziann: "That's Key of Destiny. We finished that."
    Arden: "We got everything else?"
    Peādārr: "I've got the shard of light thing, and the music box."
    Luziann: "What about the dragonlance?"
    Sindra raises it up into the air: "Mine."
    Luziann: "WHAT!?! How did she get it?"
    Sindra: "I needed a weapon, and nobody was giving me one. I took it last night."
    Luziann: "Who was watching the lance?"
    Arden: "We were supposed to be watching it?"
    Luziann: "Isn't that a holy artifact? Shouldn't it be causing you damage?"
    Sindra: "Level penalty, but its better than getting stabbed... unless you want to give me my flaming lash back."
    Luziann: "I... like the lash.... BESIDES. You're a prisoner! You shouldn't have a weapon!"
    Arden: "I thought she was part of the party?"
    Peādārr: "Why don't we just let her go? It's not like we need her here."
    Sindra: "I like this group. You people are much more evil than what I was trying to do."
    Peādārr: "I'm leaving."
    Kerra: "Hello?"
    Peādārr: "You should had dried off enough over night to climb up!"
    Kerra: "Oh. Thanks."
    The other kender: *sniff* *sniff-sniff* (And they move themselves away from Kerra).

    The session will conclude... when my fingers stop aching from typing so much.
    Last edited by Carteeg_Struve; 02-05-2010 at 02:26 PM.
    "A payment. My life will simply be a payment. But only when all are free... My fault."
    - The Prophet, as recorded from testimony in FyxZharar, 431 AD

    All must prepare. The Prophet has entered the war.

    Projects (Dragonlance, and Non-DL):
    "The Dying Towers of Ryst: An Achanian Tale"
    "Chef Nightly" (iOS/Android)
    The Adlatum Project - Sourcebook Available
    Art of Psycha Durmont

  9. #29
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    Spectre of Sorrows: Day 31 and 32

    Peādārr: "Does anybody have any idea where we're going?"
    Luziann: "Away from the erupting volcano I believe was the main idea."
    Arden: "Well, there was that elf guy we left in Kendermore."
    Peādārr: "Which way was that?"
    Arden: "Much closer to the volcano."
    Whifflenut: "Yep. We killed him."
    Arden: "We didn't kill him."
    Whifflenut: "We left him in Kendermore."
    Arden: "He could had seen the volcano go off and evacuated!"
    Whifflenut: "We left him with kender. He's dead."
    Arden: "Not those kender. There was those other kind."
    Whifflenut: "Probably just went nuts and killed himself."
    Arden: "What?"
    Whifflenut: "The stress of it all. Especially the part where he shoots himself."
    Arden: "Shoots himself?"
    Whifflenut: "Yeah. Do you know how tough it is to shoot yourself with a bow and arrow. You have to hold it backwards like this-." She tries miming the action with her hands.
    Arden sighs. "We haven't left anybody for dead."
    Sindra: "What about that guy who's brain was sucked dry by the lamia? We left him in the cave."
    Everyone gives pause.
    Whifflenut: "I'll get him!" She runs off.

    A little while later a group of dark knights ride up. The group is oblivious to the point where the knights are right on top of them before anybody notices.

    Peādārr (politely): "Hello. Are there any places of civilization around near here?"
    Sir Kalrik: "Darkhaven is to the northwest. What are you people doing out here?"
    Luziann: "Trying to leave. The volcano exploded and we're leading kender out of the area."
    Sir Kalrik: "Why?"
    Luziann stumbles for an answer to that one.
    The knight sees Sindra and balks, especially with her holding onto Huma's Dragonlance. "What are you doing with that?"
    Peādārr: "It's our prisoner. It tried to kill us, and we captured it."
    Sindra: "I would appreciate not being called an 'it', thank you very much."
    Sir Kalrik: "It's not tied up, and it's armed."
    Kerra: "They're not the best at this."
    Sir Kalrik: "We can take it into custody and off your hands."
    Sindra: "No thanks. I'm doing fine."
    Whifflenut: "HI EVERYONE! I'm back!" She tosses the severed legs to Arden.
    Arden drops them: "Ew!"
    Sir Kalrik sees the man: "Sir Brandel??"
    Luziann: "Oh hell..."
    Sir Kalrik: "What happened?"
    Whifflenut: "He was attacked by a cat-lady thing. We saved him!"
    Arden: "A lamia."
    Sir Kalrik: "The lamia cut off his legs?"
    Luziann smiles in relief and starts to nod.
    Whifflenut: "Oh no. That was us."
    Luziann mutters: "On that note." She slips away to hide.
    Whifflenut: "His leg was hurt, so we cut them off."
    Sir Kalrik: "You cut them off???"
    Whifflenut: "One was by accident. I did the wrong one. But the other was intentional." She picks them up from next to Arden. "See!"
    Arden: "He really was hurt. We healed him up as best we could."
    Whifflenut: "I even shot ray of frost spells on the severed legs to keep them cold. You should be able to reattach them now."
    Sindra (mutters): "That just does cold damage."
    Peādārr: "Shh!"
    Whifflenut: "You should have better healers than what we've got. They can probably pray to some god and heal him right back up."
    Peādārr sneers.
    Sir Kalrik: "I'll be sure to note your... assistance in my report. Take care." They take the legs and the man and after a cautious look over everyone, they depart.
    Whifflenut: "I guess they're not as evil as everyone said."
    Arden: "I can't believe they allow lamios to enlist in their army."
    Sindra (to Peādārr): "Did you ever heal any of the lamia's mental damage to him?"
    Peādārr shrugs. "Now lets find the great brave hero."

    After a minute of searching they find Luziann hiding behind a rock a small bit aways.

    Peādārr: "Your courage astounds me, coward."
    Luziann: "Considering how that conversation was going, I believe the word is 'intelligent'."

    The group continues traveling for the day until nightfall when they make camp. They are attacked by bats, who are blown away by Peādārr's wind spell. Whifflenut sees a form knocking one of the kender out and dragging him off. Whiff and Arden give chase.

    Arden: "We're gaining ground. If we can sneak-"
    Whifflenut: "HEY!"
    The form halts and turns. Whiff sees another kender who quickly turns into gas and flies away.
    Whifflenut: "COME ON! I'm supposed to be the only magical kender around here! How come that one has fart magic?"
    Arden: "Fart magic?"
    Whifflenut: "He turned into gas! That's fart magic. A fart mage tried to drag off one of the kender girls off to satisfy his lusts!"
    Arden checks up on the injured kender, who is waking up. "You alright?"
    Male afflicted kender: "I've been better."
    Whifflenut: "A guy?.... Oh. So the fart mage must had been one of those kind."
    Male afflicted kender: "All I remember is seeing his eyes.. and then..."
    Whifflenut: "Oh no.. NO! A vampire kender! You've got to be kidding! A vampire kender! That's not fair! I'm supposed to be the coolest kender here!"
    They head back and sleep.

    The next day, after more traveling, the group hears a nearby shout from a red dragonspawn. "YOU! You will die!" He and eight others start to charge the group.
    Sindra: "Vargard?"
    The lead dragonspawn pauses: "Sindra? I thought you were dead?"
    Luziann: "Oh! This is your boyfriend?"
    Whifflenut raises an eyebrow: "Boyfriend?"
    Arden looks to Luziann: "How do you know that?"
    Luziann smiles: "We spent 10 months on vacation together at a spa. What do you think we talked about?"
    Whifflenut: "How come I wasn't part of those conversations!?!"
    Luziann: "You were running that store."
    Whifflenut: "Oh yeah."
    Vargard to Sindra: "Why are you here... in a bikini? What happened to the ritual."
    Sindra: "They interrupted the spell. The magic seeped into the volcano. The entire mountain exploded. I wanted to put distance between me and it."
    Vargard: "We thought you were dead!"
    Sindra: "Did you want me to leave a note?"
    Arden: "Wait... if you were at the lair. How come we didn't see you?"
    Vargard: "I was out on patrol."
    Arden: "Must had been at another entrance. Maybe the blue square..."
    Whifflenut: "Didn't we come in through the blue square?"
    Vargard: "You need to come back with us. Let's kill these here and regroup."
    Sindra: "Var... you need to see how this group operates. We don't need to worry about them."
    Whifflenut: "Sure! Come with us!"
    Vargard: "You want us to drop everything we're doing and go with you??"
    Sindra: "The lair exploded. I'm not going back. Think this through."
    Vargard grabs her: "You abandoned us!"
    Sindra yanks her hand back and strikes him: "Remember who is in charge, Vargard."

    As true with any chaotic evil relationship, it goes downhill from here.

    Vargard: "KILL THEM ALL!" He strikes her hard. "You're coming with us."

    Fight fight fight.

    Three of the dragonspawn die (and erupt into flames). Finally Sindra kills off Vargard herself, but she is severely hurt. The rest of the dragonspawn flee.

    Luziann (injured herself, but not as badly as Sindra) sees Sindra kneeling on the ground at 4 hit points. Luz looks to her own blades and to the dragonspawn. She grins evilly as she prepares to strike. "Well, this makes getting the lance back easier."

    Sindra: "oh f-"

    TO BE CONTINUED DURING OUR NEXT SESSION
    Last edited by Carteeg_Struve; 02-05-2010 at 03:08 PM.
    "A payment. My life will simply be a payment. But only when all are free... My fault."
    - The Prophet, as recorded from testimony in FyxZharar, 431 AD

    All must prepare. The Prophet has entered the war.

    Projects (Dragonlance, and Non-DL):
    "The Dying Towers of Ryst: An Achanian Tale"
    "Chef Nightly" (iOS/Android)
    The Adlatum Project - Sourcebook Available
    Art of Psycha Durmont

  10. #30
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    Thanks for another gut busting good episode. I haven't laughed that hard in months. If only I lie ved closer I'd join in that campaign in seconds flat. This group is my kind of scum.

    Well Done!
    “There's always, always a choice. My options might really, truly suck, but that doesn't mean there isn't a choice.”

    - Harry Dresden -

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